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It’s pretty easy to talk about church conflict from a safe vantage
point. Most church people know some war
stories. And, the basic principles of handling
conflict are simple. They have to do with things like respect, humility, speaking one’s mind, and
listening to others speak their mind.
The topic is deceptively simple, and talk is cheap.
The reader might well ask, ”Who
is Dennis Hester to be adding to the list of books on church conflict
between pastor and congregation?”
Hester asked the same question of himself. In the acknowledgments section he describes
how he sought wisdom by consulting his trusted friend and mentor, Paul Sorrells. The
reader would do well to take time to read this brief acknowledgment
section. It gives the sense that the
author is not just passing along a list of platitudes he picked up
somewhere along the way.
Each chapter title is in the form of the question. Examples: At what
level or stage of conflict is your congregation?
Are you trying to solve a problem or get rid of a
person? Are you talking to each other in a
way that can be understood?
Each chapter includes a mix of material. There is
basic research about such things as different styles of leadership,
different stages of conflict, the needs of different size churches, etc. Each chapter also contains at least one
anecdote of a church situation. Where
these are based on actual events the names are changed—but the
situations are so universal that any church veteran will find them all
familiar.
A major concern of the book is finding alternatives
to forced termination of ministerial staff.
Wisdom, courage, and love are the underlying themes
of this book, as they are in Paul’s second letter to Timothy. (2 Tim 1:7) The
book is effective and convincing because the reader can sense that the
author has submitted to the process of struggling with these themes and
internalizing the related truths. The
concepts are not rocket science, but they are oh so hard to remember
and apply when you’re on the hot seat. The
book is well researched and seasoned with experience and wisdom that
comes from the trenches.
This book is an easy read, but it has some profound
insight in its pages. Hester worked hard
to condense his extensive research into a form that would not bog down
readers experiencing the stress and pain of conflict.
It would be worth your time to read Hester’s book
for yourself, whether or not you are currently experiencing church
conflict.
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